super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
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