Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize