I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
