Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Randomize
