She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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