Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
