drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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