We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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