walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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