You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
