they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
