Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
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What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
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