did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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