Please, let me fuck your mom
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
and you said cock pushups were impossible
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
