i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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