We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
this is an emotional support booty call
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
