Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
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