he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
