im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
