we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
