What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Randomize
