We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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