it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
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My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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