he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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