It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
The power of my boobs compel you
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize