Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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