So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I cut my penus on the lid.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
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