Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
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