goodnight i made you a song goodbye
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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