a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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