Just fell off a train. Bad.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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