...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Randomize
