no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
