we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
