all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
