hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
