i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
