:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize