you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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