I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
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Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
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Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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