Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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