Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
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