who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I should be sponsored by Trojan
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize