Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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