You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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