they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
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