with your own penis?
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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