are you still at the devil's house?
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
