4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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