Yo dont text me then not text me
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
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