I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
